Treating my hobbies as friendships

+ my 2025 TBR (so far)

Feb 14, 2025

Hi, it’s me 👋

The girl who closed out 2024 by recapping the 52 romance novels she read throughout the year. That same girl has not picked up a single book in 2025.

When you have a variety of interests and hobbies, you eventually accept that you can’t do everything all at once. Sometimes, I read an entire book in 2 days and pick another one up immediately after. Other times, I’m too enraptured in another hobby or activity to stop and read a book. But not reading every day—or even for weeks—doesn’t make me any less of a reader. Because while you can’t do everything at once, you can be many things at once.

The idea that we have to do something every day or on a schedule to claim it as part of our identity holds us back from trying new things. We tell ourselves, “If I’m going to be a reader, I need to read every day,” or “If I’m going to be a reader, I need to read x amount of books a year.” While some people thrive on that level of commitment (which I love for them), the reality for many of us is that our time, energy, and interests shift constantly.

Hobbies aren’t jobs. You don’t have to clock in, there’s no performance reviews, and all deadlines are arbitrary. No one is watching over you waiting for you to hit a certain page count or make a deadline. You don’t lose your “reader” title just because you haven’t picked up a book in a while—the same way you would lose your job if you stopped showing up. How we spend our free time will always shift to be in tune with how we feel at any point in time.

Instead of a job, I like to think of my hobbies as friendships instead. There are some friends you see or talk to all the time, the ones who are part of your daily or weekly routine. Then there are the ones you go months without talking to, but when you finally catch up, it’s like no time has passed. Some friendships are tied to certain seasons of life—they make sense in the moment, but over time, you naturally grow apart. Others are lifelong, always there for you when you need them. We don’t talk to all of our friends every day (imagine?!), but they are still your friends and they are still very much a part of you and your life. And I find hobbies are the same way.

Reading, for me, is the friend who never takes it personally when life gets busy, when I get caught up in a new project, or when I’m a little slow to text back. It never asks for more than I can give—it’s just there, steady and familiar, always ready to pick up where we left off.

So, while I haven’t read my first book this year, my TBR list is still growing for when I’m ready to pick up a book again (hopefully, as soon as I finish Outlander and break the spell I’m under—send help).

Books I didn’t get to last year

I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy. I’ve been wanting to read this since its release in 2022, but I haven’t fell the pull to read a memoir since then (I know, I know). I’m hoping I can finally get to it sometime this year!
Margo’s Got Money Troubles by Rupi Thorpe. I first heard of this book from Alisha Ramos at Downtime. Something about it gives me #GIRLBOSS energy and I’m kind of here for it.
The Wedding People by Alison Espach. I’ve seen this book all over my Instagram stories and came across it again when it won the Goodreads Choice Award for Readers’ Favorite Fiction last year. I’ve read lots of mixed reviews, but I’m still quite interested in the plot!

Book releases I’m looking forward to

Great Big Beautiful Life by Emily Henry. I only gave myself permission to read the last Emily Henry book on my TBR when she announced her next release. From what I’ve gathered so far, it’s giving me Book Lovers/Beach Read meets The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo and I’m all for it. The release date is April 22!
Wild Side by Elsie Silver. The Rosehill series was my introduction to the small-town, cowboy romance queen, Elsie Silver. Wild Love will probably always be my favorite, but I’m excited to see how the Rosehill world continues to grow in this new book. The release date for this one is March 4 which is right around the corner!
Say You’ll Remember Me by Abbey Jimenez. I have to admit I’m not a huge fan of the Taylor Swift reference in the title (SORRY!), but considering two of my 5-star reads last year were by Abbey Jimenez, I’m willing to set my bias aside. This one is set to release April 1!

Also on my list

Four Weekends and a Funeral by Ellie Palmer. I’m pretty sure I came across this book on Substack, but I can’t remember where for the life of me. I looked it up on Goodreads, and this review made me add it to my TBR immediately: “If Emily Henry’s Beach Read and Funny Story had a baby, it would be this book.” I’m thinking it’ll be my first read of the year!
Normal People by Sally Rooney. I have to admit I am a little intimidated by Sally Rooney’s work. Whenever I find myself considering picking up one of her books, the strongly mixed reviews push me away. I want to form my own conclusions, though, so I am picking up Normal People, which I’ve heard is the perfect entry into Sally Rooney's world.
Dominicana by Angie Cruz. I’ve been wanting to read an Angie Cruz book for a while now, a New York City-born Dominican author, so I figured I’d start with one of her more popular books. I’m also interested in reading How Not To Drown in A Glass of Water which is her most recent novel. All of her books have extremely nostalgic titles for me and I’m hoping to really love these!
The Outlander Series by Diana Gabaldon. As I’ve mentioned a couple times already, I am obsessed with Outlander. The entire series is based on Diana Gabaldon’s books, which, according to her website, she began writing in the late 1980s as “practice.” I am not sure when I’ll have the mental capacity to tackle all of these books, but I *need* to read them at some point.
I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman. I’ve been subscribed to Open Book Club NYC for a couple of months now, and this book was one of their January reads. The reviews on this book alone were enough to convince me that I needed to know what the hell happened on these pages.